Earlier this week I wrote that you can always change your mind.? While that is true, there may also be times you don?t want to change your mind, but rather want to make things work.? When it comes to your relationship, it might feel easier to just change your mind.? Before you walk away ask yourself, ?How can I improve my situation??? (This question doesn?t just apply to your relationship but can be useful for any decision you are making).
It might be easier to think about how your partner can improve your relationship.
- If only he would listen to me.
- If only she initiated sex.
- If only he helped out around the house or with the kids.
- If only she didn?t nag so much.
The reality is that you can?t change your partner.? And your partner might not want to change.? What can YOU do to improve your relationship?? How might you interact or connect differently?? People can change, but they have to be willing.? If your partner sees you making an effort he or she may do the same.
Get clear about what you really want (in your relationship or with any decision you are making).? Is it possible to get what you want in your current situation? If not, is there a way you can get it?? Or do you need to leave? (leave the relationship or the job or the living situation etc.)
Pay attention to your relationship expectations. If you assume relationships don?t take any work, then you might be tempted to leave the first time things feel hard.? Marriage is not easy. Being single is not easy. Relationships are not easy. My June Newsletter - Some Thoughts on Marriage offers more information about different aspects of marriage.
There is no recipe or road map for the perfect relationship. It?s up to your to define what you want and then strive toward it.
Source: http://www.juliejeske.com/2012/08/how-can-i-improve-my-marriage/
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